Blog: The Negotiation Edge

As we continue coaching clients all around the world, there’s a tendency we see over and over again in which folks think that certain negotiation tactics only work in the United States. 

We remind these people that hostage negotiators are all trained the same way, whether they work in Tokyo, Jakarta, Berlin, Johannesburg, or Santiago. The underlying Black Swan skills are universal because human nature is the same regardless of where you go.

That said, international negotiations are not without their challenges. Chief among them is the fact that language barriers exist. Certain words don’t have the same meaning when translated into different languages. 

Keep reading to learn more about the challenges inherent in international negotiations and what you can do to get your desired outcomes.

The Black Swan Group has a saying: It’s not a sin to not get a deal, but it is a sin to not get a deal and waste a lot of time in the process.

Sometimes, negotiators overcommit to try to get the deal no matter the circumstances. Unfortunately, there isn’t always a deal to be made. Sometimes you’re the favorite, but other times you’re the fool, and the other side is just talking to you to get information they can use to get a better deal from somebody else.

How do you know whether you’re the favorite or the fool? Simple: Ask Proof of Life™ questions.

Every person on this planet—regardless of where they hail from or their culture, ethnicity, or gender—wants someone else to understand their perspective, environment, and circumstances. 

This is precisely why listening is the key to active communication.

No matter how sharp your skills are, you’re bound to have some weaknesses as a negotiator. By identifying those weaknesses and getting in enough low-stakes reps as practice, you can strengthen your skills and achieve better negotiation outcomes.

The Black Swan Group often recommends using Labels™ to describe emotions that are displayed, verbalized, or implied but not directly articulated. In this negotiation skills training post, we will explore Mislabels—the Label’s counterpart.

Here’s a negotiation tip: The world’s most effective negotiators understand that they can always sharpen their skills and improve, regardless of the outcome of their last engagement.

The best negotiators are all focused on the same thing: using Tactical Empathy™ to understand what is making their counterpart tick and influencing their decision-making.

To get there, it’s critical to sharpen your social and emotional intelligence skills.

After all, you always want to be in a position where you can tell your counterpart that you understand exactly what they’re thinking. Ideally, you should be able to vocalize their thoughts from their perspective so perfectly that they have no choice but to respond with the two magic words: that’s right.

Once you’ve reached that point, the deal closes itself. 

Many humans have a hard time communicating clearly with other people. More often than not, we beat around the bush and talk in roundabout ways instead of being upfront, open, and honest. In many cases, understanding what someone is saying can feel like pulling teeth.

The good news is that by making it a habit to use active communication, you can increase the likelihood you are easily understood, leading to more deals. Here’s how to do that: 

Every now and again, the best negotiators find themselves sitting across the table from someone who is nonconfrontational.

Because we are all so accustomed to dealing with counterparts who love to battle, it’s always worth revisiting the most effective ways to deal with nonconfrontational people.

Though I’ve retired from active duty, I’m still a reserve deputy in my local county. Recently, a new assistant chief came into the department and wanted to show the rest of the crew that he had power. So he met with the reserves and talked about 10 different projects he wanted to get off the ground.