Blog: The Negotiation Edge

Our company used to say, “Yes is nothing without how.” But after years of negotiations, we’ve realized that this isn’t completely accurate. In reality, yes means nothing. How is everything.

After receiving an offer, you may be asking yourself, “How do I know I got everything that I could have gotten?”

When we’re faced with a difficult negotiation, many of us make the mistake of thinking that niceness will help us get what we want. To make ourselves seem more agreeable, we switch into an overly energized tone and take every opportunity to smile or nod enthusiastically—sometimes without knowing we’re doing it.

I’ll be honest—I’m not a fan of the elevator pitch. The idea of preparing a 30-second sales speech in which you explain your idea or solution and why it’s valuable goes against every unwritten rule of persuasion. Although it’s intended to drum up excitement in a short window of time, this sales technique inevitably breeds resentment and rejection.

The term “active listening” is easy to misinterpret. Oftentimes, it’s used to describe the nonverbal cues (like nodding and direct eye contact) that we use to show someone that we’re paying attention to what they’re saying. Other times, it’s used to refer to minimal encouragers—short verbal expressions like “uh-huh” and “hmm” that we interject to demonstrate our engagement. Although both examples are powerful communication techniques, they don’t fully encompass or explain what makes this approach active.

If you’re looking to sustain a competitive advantage, make a habit out of reading. Devoting yourself to just one chapter a night will keep negotiating tactics top of mind and turn you into a natural.

Why do some people seem more persuasive than others? The ability to gain influence in a negotiation doesn’t have to do with your personality or how naturally charismatic you are. The secret to getting what you want goes far beyond your height, complexion, or number of degrees. Improving influence surpasses book knowledge and IQ. Reading the circumstance below the surface is key. Here lies 5 examples of how to get better at using methods of persuasion.

There’s no shortage of bad managers in the world. Most of them aren’t inherently evil people—they’re simply poor communicators. Being an effective leader and earning the respect of your colleagues comes down to honing your communication and emotional intelligence (EQ) skills more than any other attribute. No matter what your industry or your job title is, if you manage people, these five communication & EQ techniques are essential to your success.

As a professional negotiator, I’ve witnessed a fair share of negotiation mishaps and mistakes. When conversations and deals fall apart, it’s usually not because of anything the other side said. More often, it’s because the lead negotiator unintentionally sabotaged themselves. Below, I’ve outlined the three most common ways that people take themselves hostage in negotiations—and how to overcome them.  

Although first impressions don’t always stick, they do inform how much time, attention, and trust you earn right off the bat. On average, first impressions are solidified in just seven seconds. In a high-stakes or high-stress situation, that tiny window may be the only opportunity you have to start a conversation. Whether you’re cold-calling a prospect or conducting an FBI hostage negotiation, we’ve outlined some tips for making those first seconds count.