What happens when you trigger “That’s right” several times in a salary negotiation? How about getting a salary offer 41% higher than you expected?
“I’m telling you now man, if y’all do anything foolish, these people are gonna get hurt,” Mike said after taking 12 people hostage during a botched robbery. Our being there meant that we wanted him to surrender peacefully. In other words, we wanted Mike to say, “Yes.” His utterance was an emphatic “No.”
Think of this as “You had me at ‘no’” meets “think like Elon Musk.” “Do you want the FBI to be embarrassed?” –effective pause – “What do you want me to do?” The above example is from our book “Never Split The Difference” where an FBI hostage negotiator – Marti Evelsizer – was negotiating with her (jealous) boss. He wanted to remove her from her position as head of the Pittsburgh FBI...
It is always nice to have breathing room in a negotiation. Not monetary breathing room, breathing room in the conversation. What we refer to as breathing room is this moment or space in time, during the interaction, where you can collect your thoughts and refocus your attention.