In a Q & A session I did for the internet based forum Quora: I answered the question “What’s the worst mistake you can make in salary negotiations?” with this answer: “Simply saying “yes” or “I accept” to an offer.
Whether or not you realize it we have all used “tell me more” when questioning someone about a topic we want to know more about. More often than not our intentions are inquisitive and open-ended but we forget that the simplest definition of an open-ended question is one that cannot be answered with a “yes” or “no”. Unfortunately at times our desire to know more gets in the way of the mission to be collaborative.
“The most dangerous negotiation is the one you don’t know you’re in.”
What does that mean and how can I use it? It means the truly dangerous negotiator starts by grabbing every edge he/she can get.
Many times in life we are our own worst enemy, critic or obstacle. The same reins true in negotiation. Sometimes we start to compromise before providing the other party a chance to negotiate amongst themselves, or even more dangerous, we have a false perception of leverage which really did not exist.